nextgenerationmarvel | The Artist (Out Of Her Natural Environment)

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The Artist (Out Of Her Natural Environment)

Alistaire pulled up to the house. He still couldn't believe that Grandfather had run Alisa out of the city. He'd deal with that in due time, but right now, he had to get her to stop running. This location was a joke. A dirt road driveway? He was probably going to have to throw away these shoes. A large parcel was in the trunk of the Tesla Roadster he'd bought for the drive. He glanced back over his shoulder at it, before ringing the bell.

It was a lovely house, even if the location was a joke. He'd have to make sure to help her with the reselling.

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"She doesn't do things by halves, does she?" Alistaire comments, rounding a corner, worrying at one of his sleeves, making sure he didn't get anything spattered on it. He leaned against wall, watching the new arrival cautiously, sifting through mental files.

"The infamous Ryan Grimm. Pleasure to meet you. Alistaire Shaw."

A 'friend'. Is that what he is?

A friend?

Is that what Alistaire was?

Ryan raised an eyebrow, but brought his hand forth anyway, after having shifted the bag of food and the Blu-Ray to his other hand.

"The notorious Alistaire Shaw. I'd say it's a pleasure, but my parents taught me early on not to lie. The pleasure, I'm afraid, will have to be all yours." His eyes ticked towards Alisa, the question in them clear. What's going on? "I hope I'm not interrupting something important."

"You weren't. Alistaire found out where I lived, barged in, asked me to paint him wit' pay... an' den I invited him to stay for a bit, in a guest room on de far side o' de house." She gave Ryan a look as though she wanted to say more but could not. Not here, anyway. Alisa then moved to stand outside with Ryan, and shut the door so they had some privacy while Alistaire was still inside.

"I got no clue how he found me! I didn' give him my new address! He den pretty much demanded I paint his portrait. I was cool wit' dat, only he didn' tell me it was a semi-nude potrait! Dis whole time, he's been makin' me t'ink about goin' back, questionin' everyt'ing, an' I don' know what de fuck I am doin', Ryan... I'm like on auto pilot or idiot mode! Once de school finds out about dis I'm done!"

Alistaire was in the middle of a perfectly polite-but-firm handshake with Ryan, when Alisa whisks him away. He smiles and shrugs to himself, heading to set the table. He could faintly make out some of the initial conversation. A bit light on context, but nothing untrue. Dinner would be interesting.

Ryan listened quietly and calmly for a long moment while Alisa went on in that quick, excited, word-jumbly way that she sometimes had. "Okay, Alisa? Breathe. I'm not angry. A little bit confused, because you keep on saying how you want nothing to do to him, but he comes on popping up - in more than one way, it would seem - but..." Ryan's brow furrowed for a moment. "Alisa. You and Alistaire have a history. And he's still not...he's still not over you. Obviously. Clearly. Do you...Do you still reciprocate those feelings for him, Alisa? On any level?"

"Dere a little part o' me does." She hated to admit it. It actually brought her to tears. "But if I do dat, what's to say I won' lose another limb, or get killed. He'd never love me back. Jus' ... he'd jus' use me all over again. No matter what he tells me, he'd never change! So... why does dis tiny part o' me still exist, Ryan?"

It hurt to actually say that. Once she had a clear head (and Alistaire had his clothes ON), she realized he was manipulating that small, insecure part of her. Playing her like a violin, offering her an easy way out instead of all the hard work she had been trying to do.

"Ryan? You haven' touched me in a long time. You don' invite me to go meet your friends, or meet your family. Are you ashamed o' me?" She had to ask. "Did I do sumt'ing wrong to you? I jus' ... I love you. An' I don' know if I am doin' sumt'ing wrong or somet'ing to drive you away from me."

"I...can't answer that question for you, Alisa," Ryan replied. "About why you feel the way you feel. That's...I mean, that's some soul searching stuff right there." He sighed and leaned against the wall opposite Alisa, crossing his arms and staring at her intently. "And no, I'm not ashamed of you. But my family is...it's tricky, Alisa. My brother was attacked by someone with eyes very similar to yours, and meeting you would bring back bad memories. I can't subject him to that until he's okay. And the others...well. Given your past, it would be a hard sell. We have issues enough with Vincent Amorason - or von Doom, whatever name he's using this week - and he was an Avenger. An Avenger who's related to Dr. Doom, so you can see why we have our apprehensions. You aren't doing anything wrong. This is just very...complicated." He paused, his eyes ticking towards the door to Alisa's place. "All kind of complicated, clearly."

"I didn' know dat." She sighed, joining him with her back against the wall by his side. "I'm sorry someone hurt your brother dat badly. An' well... I guess all families are tricky? I really don' know."

She pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to think.

"It's like Alistaire knows when I'm at my weakest an' shows right up to take advantage o' it. An' I've nearly fallen for it TWICE. It's two times too many, Ryan! I am wit' you, an' I don' ... no, I can' go back to de life I had wit' Alistaire. I'm not better den de Xavier School like he says! I'm better den him!" Her eyes narrowed. "Dat said... how do you feel like helpin' me get a RAT outta my house? Maybe my life for good? I am not gonna go back to de city wit' him. I'm NOT gonna risk gettin' played like a violin ever again. An' if I REALLY have to, I'll get a restrainin' order on him to keep him away! I mean really... it's creepy how he finds me, sometimes."

She gave a visible shiver. It was getting cold outside, and this was playing on her nerves.

"It's not something that we really discuss?" Ryan said. "Alisa...there has to be something there that keeps on drawing you back to him whenever he appears in front of you. Clearly, there's something unresolved that needs to either be resolved...or be continued." He paused and then drew a very deep breath. "You keep on flip-flopping, Alisa. That means that there's something incredibly wrong here. I don't claim to be the brightest guy - powers not taken into consideration - but there's a pattern." He turned his head so that he was looking at Alisa. "I like you, I do. I can't say that it's love yet because it feels too soon for me to say that, but I like you. Having said that, though, I'm not sure if you know what you want yet, Alisa. It feels like when I'm in front of you, you want to get rid of Alistaire, but whenever I'm not around...he seems to be. Around you, I mean." His brow furrowed. "I think that you need some time alone to sort through things - your feelings - figure them out. See what you really want or need right now. Because this has the potential to get really messy, and none of us need that."

That... was hard to swallow.

"I need some time alone? I've had plenty o' time alone, Ryan! Every-time I am alone, if I move, if I go somewhere... dere is Alistaire Shaw, uninvited, tellin' me how I deserve better den what I am doin' ! I don' go to him! I don' wanna go to him!" She pointed towards the house.

"Everyt'ing gets twisted an' turned upside down around him, an' I don' know what to t'ink or do! I can' tell left from right, up from down! He knows how to t'row me off balance an' bring chaos into my life. Take away every good t'ing jus' so I will go back to him! Breakin' t'ings off wit' me is like a huge WIN to a sociopath like him!"

She looked scared, she really looked scared that the only good thing left in her life was going to just up and leave. That little sparkle that made her smile and happy.

"Please, don' do dis..."

"Alisa," Ryan said coolly. "You yourself said that you almost went back to him. While I was still in your life." He shrugged. "You asked him to spend the night. Even if its on the other side of the apartment, a part of you had to know that he would try to wrangle his way into your bed. This isn't about anyone winning or anyone losing. This is about figuring out what you need. I mean, you have to know that the Xavier Institute is going to find out about this too. The headmistress is a frighteningly powerful telepath." He paused, then, thinking about the nightmares he'd been having, of him in space, and of...

He pressed his lips together in a thin line before opening his mouth to exhale. "Sometimes, no matter how far we run, maybe we're just meant to do the thing we don't want to do, to be with the people we don't want to be with. That sounds messed up, I know, but if Alistaire's gravity is that strong for you that you keep on getting drawn back in...look. It doesn't matter, clearly, whether I'm in your life or not. I could have been anyone else, and the same thing would have happened with Alistaire. Like it or not, he's going to be a part of your life until he's not - and that's clearly going to be up to him, not you, because so far, he's still here. This hurts, I know this hurts, and I'm sorry. But this is a battle that you need to fight, and so far, it feels as though you're just continuously giving in to the other side until you can find someone else to try and hide behind. I can't be that guy, Alisa. I'd love to be, but my life's complicated enough already, and I know I'm not going to end up the hero of this particular story. If you loved me the way that you said you did, then Alistaire wouldn't even have been here right now, despite whatever's been going on between the two of us."

It would have been kinder to just plunge a dagger deep inside of her and twist it around then to hear any of that. She did not want her destiny to be someone's pawn or plaything anymore. She did not want to be manipulated. And she did not want to hurt Ryan anymore, either. he was right, if she loved him as much as she said she did... Alistaire would not have been allowed to stay over. What was she thinking? It's obvious she wasn't.

"I'm sorry I was such a burden." Her voice was flat, emotionless. "You should see Mrs. Ramsey about your nightmares. I'd go wit' you... but de chances o' me bein' allowed on de grounds again are slim. Please be careful goin' back to de city. Traffic is terrible dis time o' night."

Her eyes were watery, but she refused to let tears fall from them. Instead her shoulders slumped and she started to head back inside of her house. She could not bare to tell Ryan good-bye. Mostly because it could be forever. She did not want that, mostly because she could not face it.

Instead of shutting the door behind her, Alisa left it open and just headed up the spiral staircase and to the room across from the master bedroom. She did not acknowledge Alistaire when she walked inside. Instead, she shut the door behind her and locked it.

So this is what heartbreak felt like?

Ryan blinked, not getting a chance to explain himself before she walked away. She hadn't been a burden to him, but tonight had simply made him realize that some things were not as they should have been.

He drew another deep breath, pushed himself away from the wall, and closed the front door of the apartment.

Alistaire was inside. He could pick up the pieces.

At least, he could if he could manage doing so without breaking Alisa further.

Shaking his head - this had become a surprisingly rough night - Ryan left the premises, dumping the seafood stew and taking to the sky.

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The Artist (Out Of Her Natural Environment)

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